You've seen those Jack Link's Beef Jerky commercials, right? You know, the ones where people are ''Messin' with Sasquatch" when all the creature wants is just some of their jerky? Could those be taking place right now in Wichita Falls and we just didn't know it?

That's the only logical explanation for a recent arrest report from the Wichita Falls Police Department. According to KFDX, a Wichita Falls Woman is behind bars facing multiple charges of theft after allegedly stealing over $600 worth of Jack Link's Beef Jerky.

Gail Murphy (WFPD)

Police say that 48-year-old Gail Murphy walked into the Stripes on Call Field Road on three separate occasions and stole several bags of the jerky. Officers say the grand total for all three times was around $650. That's a lot of jerky.

Now, I'm no lawyer, but if I was, I'd be advising Ms. Murphy to use the old 'Bigfoot Defense' for sure. Obviously, there's a Sasquatch living somewhere in our city and she didn't want the peaceful creature subjected to the acts of degradation depicted in multiple TV commercials. She was just trying to get the jerky to the creature before it was too late. Obviously.

To reiterate, no, I am not a lawyer. I have never even taken a single law class. Murphy's bond was set at $45,000.

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